Monday, December 7, 2015

All those errors

Found online: In all, Virginia forced 19 turnovers and turned those W&M errors into 20 points.

You don't need In all at all. Same with those W&M errors.


Virginia forced 19 turnovers and turned them into 20 points.


That'll work just fine.


By the way, I really like this writer, but I sometimes wish I could edit his writing.

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EMAIL: tgilli52@gmail.com  TWITTER: EDITORatWORK


ENTRIES FROM THE DOG BLOG

BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)

Thursday, November 12, 2015

Sacrifices we make

NEWSPAPER HEADLINE: Normally, I enjoy headline mistakes, but I doubt this headline writer realized what is wrong with this head.

City holds annual

program highlighting
human sacrifices

I'm sure the story is about sacrifices that lawmen, firefighters, teachers and others make to do their work. But, I'm sorry, "human sacrifices" makes me think of devil worshipers, some idiot with a knife and people dying.


It's in the story lede as well.


Shiver...


LINKS: On my web siteI have links to some of my stories online.

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ENTRIES FROM THE DOG BLOG

BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)