A better way to say it...

Needs editing: “I got in the game and I wanted to prove I belong here,” said the 6-foot-1, 213-pound Royster, who on Washington’s final drive received two carries and picked up 14 yards on the first and six yards on the second.

That dependent clause at the end could use help:

... Royster, who had carries for 14 and six yards on Washington’s final drive.

Another CSI: The Crime Scene Investigation (CSI) TV shows are popular (I like them, too). I just found another CSI ... the College of Southern Idaho. CSI sounded familiar for some reason.


More later.

More editing/writing blog entries

• You really DO need an editor

• Reminders for would-be novelists

• What I do when I'm editing

• Slogging through the Internet

• J-school: More eyes on your stories

• J-school: Go out and learn

• Rookie mistakes for magazine writers

Blog entries on The Auto Racing Journal:

• Angel in Black: Remembering Dale Earnhardt Sr.

(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)

• Then Junior Said to Jeff...

(the book of great NASCAR stories)

• My best day as a sports writer

• Jeff Gordon's milk toast to Dale Earnhardt

• Wayne Auton: A life in racing

More blog entries by Tom Gillispie

• Resume for a writer and editor

• An editor's views on powerful writing

• Advice for be and would-be novelists

• Links to TG's stories online

• Favorite quotes

• What I do when I'm editing

Anecdotes by Tom Gillispie

• Wipeout at Death Valley

• Days with rainbows

• A desperate writer working in the dark

• Yer outta there!