Showing posts with label confused sentence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label confused sentence. Show all posts

Friday, November 24, 2023

HIDDEN BENEATH ANTARCTIC ICE FOR EONS

HEADLINE FOUND ONLINE: Hidden beneath Antarctic ice for eons, scientists have made a chilling ancient discovery.

I've written about this sort of thing before. It sounds like the scientists have been hidden beneath Antarctic ice for eons.

You might change it this way: Scientists have found a chilling ancient discovery hidden beneath Antarctic ice. You don't need ancient and eons in the same sentence; that's redundant.

I DO like the way they got chilling and ice together in the same sentence.

EMAIL: tgilli52@gmail.com  TWITTER: EDITORatWORK

ENTRIES FROM THE DOG BLOG

BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)

Sunday, December 15, 2019

At 89, This Is the Car

FOUND ON YOUTUBE: At 89, This Is the Car Clint Eastwood Drives

This makes it sound like Clint Eastwood's car is 89 years old. Let's try again:

This is the car that 89-year-old Clint Eastwood drives

EMAIL: tgilli52@gmail.com  TWITTER: EDITORatWORK

(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)

More blog entries by Tom Gillispie

Anecdotes by Tom Gillispie