Showing posts with label shorter way to say it. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shorter way to say it. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

A shorter paragraph

This could have been said in one sentence.

Will a graduate assistant be in charge of Virginia's tight ends this year? That's a possibility, London said.

The change?

A graduate assistant could be in charge of Virginia's tight ends this year, London said.

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ENTRIES FROM THE DOG BLOG

BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)

Saturday, November 27, 2010

An editor's choices

A wire story on Saturday said that the Panthers' Armanti Edwards was also added to the injury list as questionable because of a sore back.

I'd simply change it to this:

Receiver Armanti Edwards was listed as questionable with a sore back.

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ENTRIES FROM THE DOG BLOG

BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)