Thursday, May 27, 2010

The lede (lead)

I LIKED THE EFFORT this writer made, but I think there's a better way.

It's a new era in Virginia football.

New Cavaliers coach Mike London has one tall task in front of him.

I'd drop the first sentence and go this way:

Mike London, the new Virginia Cavaliers football coach, has one tall task in front of him.

Why the change? I think the "new era" sentence would work better when London was hired (after Al Groh's firing). The new era has been underway for several months. Get on with it.

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