Too much rushing

Needs editing: And the defense was manhandled by Notre Dame’s running game, which piled up 212 rushing yards and three rushing touchdowns in a victory that was never in doubt.

The writer talks about Notre Dame's running game, then piles on with rushing yards and rushing touchdowns. This can be re-written this way:

And the defense was manhandled by Notre Dame’s running game, which piled up 212 yards and three touchdowns in a victory that was never in doubt.

More editing/writing blog entries

• You really DO need an editor

• Reminders for would-be novelists

• What I do when I'm editing

• Slogging through the Internet

• J-school: More eyes on your stories

• J-school: Go out and learn

• Rookie mistakes for magazine writers

Blog entries on The Auto Racing Journal:

• Angel in Black: Remembering Dale Earnhardt Sr.

(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)

• Then Junior Said to Jeff...

(the book of great NASCAR stories)

• My best day as a sports writer

• Jeff Gordon's milk toast to Dale Earnhardt

• Wayne Auton: A life in racing

More blog entries by Tom Gillispie

• Resume for a writer and editor

• An editor's views on powerful writing

• Advice for be and would-be novelists

• Links to TG's stories online

• Favorite quotes

• What I do when I'm editing

Anecdotes by Tom Gillispie

• Wipeout at Death Valley

• Days with rainbows

• A desperate writer working in the dark

• Yer outta there!