Tuesday, December 29, 2009

A more emphatic way to say it

POSSIBLE EDIT: “He wants the same things I do,” Holmgren said. “We want the team to be better, we want to win, we want the fans to feel good, we’re going after the same thing.”

Most editors would leave this as it is. But there's a more emphatic way to say it.

“He wants the same things I do,” Holmgren said. “We want the team to be better; we want to win; we want the fans to feel good.

"We’re going after the same thing.”

><

EMAIL: tgilli52@gmail.com  TWITTER: EDITORatWORK


ENTRIES FROM THE DOG BLOG

BLOG ENTRIES FROM THE AUTO RACING JOURNAL
(a book of great stories about the Intimidator)
(the book of great NASCAR stories)

2 comments: